"Paying it Forward … "

Molly posted this over at Dark Oak Woman. I was the first to leave a comment with her, so I am looking forward to something hand made by Molly in the near future. Here's how you play:

"I will send a handmade gift to the first 3 people who leave a comment on my blog requesting to join this Pay It Forward exchange. I don't know what that gift will be yet and you may not receive it tomorrow or next week, but you will receive it within 365 days, that is my promise! The only thing you have to do in return is pay it forward by making the same promise on your blog."

So, just leave a comment with your e-mail address and if you are one of the first three to leave a comment, I will send you something hand made. Right now I am making doilies and other Christmas goodies, so you will have to wait until after Christmas to receive your giftie. There is no telling what I might make for you, but it will be crocheted, that I can promise.

If you play, put this on your own blog and pay it forward by sending handmade items to the first three people who leave comments! If you do not have a blog, I guess you can not play. Awww … quick, go set up a blog!!

Joy

I recently read a topic on Amy's Live, Learn, Knit blog titled What Brings You Joy? In her post Amy mentioned a book she had read, Let Your Life Speak by Parker J. Palmer, which I have added to my "must read" list. During this past week's marathon NaNo writing, I found myself often distracted from my story and thinking about joy. I began to wonder what the difference was between joy and pleasure, since I could easily think of many things that brought pleasure to my world, but not so many things that seemed to bring joy. So today I looked up the words "pleasure" and "joy" online and found an explanation that suited me at Dictonary.com.

Pleasure, enjoyment, delight, joy refer to the feeling of being pleased and happy. Pleasure is the general term: to take pleasure in beautiful scenery. Enjoyment is a quiet sense of well-being and pleasurable satisfaction: enjoyment at sitting in the shade on a warm day. Delight is a high degree of pleasure, usually leading to active expression of it: delight at receiving a hoped-for letter. Joy is a feeling of delight so deep and so lasting that one radiates happiness and expresses it spontaneously: joy at unexpected good news.

So what does bring me joy?

My first thought was writing, but writing is not always joyful or even pleasurable. It can be difficult, painful and emotionally revealing, none of which brings me joy. Writing is something that I have to do, like breathing and eating. It is a rare day that I do not write something, whether a blog post, an email or a letter to a friend (sometimes those are even handwritten!). It does not matter to me whether anyone reads what I write or not. The possibility of an audience is not why I choose write.

Reading also comes to mind, but again, it is more of a need I have, like an addiction to caffeine or nicotine. A day is not complete if I have not had my daily fix of word input and output, reading and writing.

Crocheting gives me pleasure and satisfaction. I find it relaxing, soothing. But crocheting does not give me joy. The act of giving a crocheted item away, knowing that it will be used and appreciated by the recipient, that gives me joy. I never really understood why we needed to save an item that someone had made, pass it down from generation to generation, never to be used. To me, the value of the item is in knowing the person who created that item. If I did not personally know great-grandma Tilly, I am not going to value something made by her nearly as much as I am going to value something made by my Grammy. And so it brings me joy to know that items I have made and given to others are actually being used. That was the reason I made them in the first place!

Here is a picture of the baby afghan I made for my niece's new baby boy:

Knowing that Aiden's older brother loved his afghan and carried it around with him for several years gave me great joy. I hope Aiden enjoys his half as much.

Here is another thing that gives me joy:

Copper has taken to sleeping on laptops and computers. When it was ninety degrees and better outside, she preferred sleeping out on our balcony all day long. But when cooler temperatures came in September, she ceased wanting to go out on the balcony and now sleeps away the day on top of laptops or any other computer she can find that is running and warm. Anyway, just seeing a cat gives me pleasure, but having one (or more) of my own that I can interact with gives me joy.

Photography brings me joy. Amy mentioned photography and art in her post, too. Unlike Amy, I have never been interested in the darkroom and developing of pictures. What I love is the hunt for a good subject, the art of framing the subject and the sense of accomplishment I feel when I capture a moment in time. That gives me joy, knowing that I have saved some essence of "now" that can easily be recaptured in the future simply be looking at the picture.

My children, of course, bring me moments of joy. Their individual births were three such moments. Add to that my granddaughter, Miss Munchkin; I was lucky enough to be present at her birth and one of the very first to hold her. Miss Munchkin brings me joy almost every time I see her. There is just something about a toddler who is happy and curious and loving that is joyful, especially when she is related to you.

I feel joy when we hit the road for a road trip, whether it is just a day's jaunt somewhere or a vacation. There is something truly joyous about leaving behind the every day world for a bit and looking forward towards possible great adventures. And I feel joy every time I step onto a beach. Hearing the waves crashing onto shore and the cry of the gulls, feeling the heat of the sun through the sand on your bare feet, the smell of the salt spray, it all fills me with joy. Oh, and the skirl of bagpipes bring me joy. If ever I were to come across bagpipes being played on the beach while I was walking barefoot with my granddaughter, my heart would likely burst from experiencing too much joy all at once.

Amy's post talks a lot about finding joy in your work or rather work that you find joyful. I know this is the goal of many unschoolers, to find a way to turn their passion into a career. That is a great goal, although I know few that have been able to truly realize it. The only possible work-related thing that brings me joy is being able to find answers and resources for others. I love to research; I love to hunt for the perfect gift, for the perfect book, for that needed quote or just the right word that will complete a project. I think that is why I continue with my website, since HTML and web design certainly does not bring me joy. On the contrary, many days it fills me with stress and frustration. But I love to know that a resource I have reviewed or something I have written has provided an answer to someone's quest. That brings me joy.

So, what brings you joy?

Catching Up

Now that NaNo (National Novel Writing Month) is over and successfully completed, it is time to begin catching up on all that was left hanging during November. For those of you who have asked, this first completed novel is not something that anyone will ever see. A first draft is just that, a first draft, and not meant for anyone but the author's eyes. Whether I retain any of this first effort remains to be seen, but it is doubtful. My basic intent was just to prove to myself that I could do it, that I could actually finish a novel. Too many stories have I begun and set aside when the going got tough or life intruded. But now I know I am capable; I can see a story line through from beginning to end. Not only that, but writing that many words in not an impossibility, as long as you keep writing! That is the key, to keep writing!

I did discover one thing about myself. That email is my main time waster. When I removed myself from the computer that has my email program, I could write for several hours without even thinking about email. I accomplished big things! But sitting at the computer with my email, the temptation is there to check it frequently. This not only takes time away from actual writing but also distracts the mind, causing me to lose the flow of the story and lose my momentum. Better to write one hour uninterrupted than to write three hours with many interruptions. As I was reading my favorite blogs (playing catch up after finishing the story Thursday), I came across a timely post: How to Keep E-Mail from Wasting Your Time. If you have find email to be taking up too much of your daily focus, check out the article. It has some good tips!

So, what do I need to catch up on? Besides the usual laundry, dishes and house cleaning? Numero Uno is my desk! I had done quite a good job of keeping it clean until NaNo hit. Oi! It is going to take all afternoon to find the desktop again.

Second is crocheting. I finished the baby afghan for my niece's new baby boy. I will get a picture taken later today and posted up asap. Thursday, while waiting for my car at the dealership (which I still do not have back!), I began working on a doily for a Christmas present. I need to make two and will not be able to post up pictures of those until after they have been given to their intended recipient. And I have several items to make for Miss Munchkin. First her Christmas stocking and then two hat and mitten ensembles, one for her and one for the dolly that Santa is going to be bringing her. Or for her favorite Miss Kitty stuffed animal or any of her mommy's several teddy bears that are fair game for playing with. She is at the age where she likes dressing up dollies and kitties and bears. Hmm . . . maybe I will need to make more than two.

Third, Christmas cards must go out soon. I did not send out cards last year … last year was the Christmas from Hell and no one felt in the mood to do any celebrating. Plus, with our move, I need to get cards out early so that people have our new address. Luckily, the MC (main character) in my just completed novel wrote her Christmas letter and it looks remarkably like what I need for my letter! So that is done and I just need to get it printed off and mailed out.

And last, but certainly not least, I am sure that my readers here would appreciate something new to read besides NaNo updates for the month of December. So I will strive to provide something that might actually be interesting and/or thought-provoking reading, although maybe not both at the same time!

Day Eight

Yesterday was a much better day for NaNo writing. I managed to type 5200 words, which brings my grand total to 20,677. Phew! So six more days like that and I will make 50K. Of course, with Turkey Day coming up and all that requires, I do not think I will get another 5K-word day until next Monday. That will be cutting it way too close for comfort.

I just spent all morning at the car shop getting my van serviced and a small repair done. So no writing then, although I did get a lot of crocheting accomplished. I am working on an afghan for my niece Melanie, who is due with her second child any day now. So that was not wasted time, really. Just not writing time.

And then this afternoon is a trip to the grocery store. Oh goody. The grocery store two days before Thanksgiving. Brave, aren't I? Or just plain insane!

Finished projects

Finally! At Last! It's About Time!

My niece graduated from high school last May and I just last night finished her graduation present. The weather is getting cool enough now, maybe she'll need it at college!

The pattern is called "Southwestern Cables Afghan" designed by Karen Wolfram. My niece didn't care about pattern or size; she just wanted something with yellow and bright colors. What looks like red is actually a Red Heart's Shocking Pink. Why is it that pics taken inside do not always show the true colors?

Here you can see part of the reverse side.

It fits a full-sized bed just nicely. I hope my niece likes it. It is tightly wove, a very warm afghan! Should keep her warm at that north Georgia college.

I also found this scarf that I crocheted last spring. Miss Munchkin was going through a phase of wrapping ties and scarves and other pieces of clothing around her neck, so I made a scarf for her out of Bernat's Softee Chunky, Circus.

There was enough yarn to make two, so this one is going on to my E-bay Store later today. The rule is a six-inch ruler, just to give you an idea of how long the scarf is.

Catching Up

I can see I should have set a goal for writing daily in April! Goals. Must have goals! And deadlines! All procrastinators work better when there is a deadline looming.

Here are some pics of Miss Munchkin from Easter Sunday. She had fun gathering Easter eggs at my dad's, even though she did not have a clue what was going on. Once she got one egg in each hand, she just grinned and watched all the other kids running about, picking up eggs.

And here's a pic of the handbag I crocheted for Miss Munchkin. I had troubles with the handle and will probably have to redo it, but she seemed to like it.

It's been a busy April. On the 5th I drove to Evansville to bring David home for Easter break. And on the 9th I drove him back. And then on the 11th we (Bill, Charles and I) drove to Tallahassee. Bill had an interview there on the 12th (his birthday!), which we are still waiting to hear the final verdict on. Hopefully we will get word soon.

Friday the 13th we drove to Jacksonville, just to see. There are more job opportunities there, but none of us felt at all comfortable there. It is just too big of a city. Way too many people. Way too much traffic. We drove right on through and headed for St. Augustine, spending Friday night there. On Saturday morning (the 14th) we visited Castillo de San Marcos and walked the beach long enough to get the beginnings of a nice tan. It was lovely. Saturday afternoon we headed back to Tallahassee and then for home, driving through some very nasty storms but arriving safe and sound in the wee hours of Sunday morning. It was very nice to be home. And it was a good thing we came home earlier than planned. Bill had turned off the power strip to my fish tank before we left. I had some very cold, hungry fish in dire need of some oxygen! The tank was down to 62 degrees and most of the fish were just lying on the bottom, slowly fluttering their fins / tails. But I did not see any dead ones. I think they must have been practically hibernating from the cold and lack of oxygen. By Sunday morning they were looking much improved, swimming around the top, waiting for their breakfast!

Miss Munchkin's Birthday

I did not post an entry yesterday because it was Miss Munchkin's first birthday and I was very busy! I began crocheting a YoYo Bunny back in early January, but somehow, like usual, it came down to the wire and I spent five hours yesterday finishing it. And finish it I did, with time to spare (a whole half an hour!). It looks sort of cute, in a disturbing kind of way, but I am not sure how well it will hold together. If it falls apart, probably the yoyo's will be more fun to play with than the bunny!

Miss Munchkin had a small first birthday party, with just family there, grandparents and uncles and aunts. She loved the black cat that we had made at Wack-a-Bear or whatever that store is called. Most of all, though, she liked the balls that Uncle Charles picked out. They were one of the first gifts she opened and after that, she tried to bounce every other gift. If it did not bounce, then back she went to the balls!

And, of course, there was the obligatory chocolate cake with frosting! Mommy and Daddy just could not understand why both grandmothers thought that a little girl covered in cake and frosting was so cute! When we left, Miss Munchkin was headed for the bathtub for a thorough cleaning.

Finished Afghan

Here's a pic of the crochet afghan I've been working on for the past couple of years (on again, off again). I finished it Sunday. It fits nicely on the couch, although it doesn't match the couch at all. Maybe it will match my new living room, someday! In the meantime, it's nice and warm!

Now to finish Miss Munchkin's YoYo Bunny before her birthday!

December update

I just checked when I last wrote here and can't believe it was so long ago. Where did December go? It's been a month of ups and downs and not one I'd like to repeat for a long time to come.

Mr. Algae-Eater seems to have recovered nicely. I bought some sort of aloe juice medicine that was supposed to be for sores on fish and added it each day for a week. It seemed to do the trick. He's back to his old self.

We did take a trip to Tallahassee last week and Bill interviewed for a position with a company there. He liked the company, so now we are just waiting to see if they liked him enough to hire him. Or if they thought they needed his experience enough to hire him, as they have a huge mess to clean up. Hopefully we'll hear soon. Bill and I really liked it there. The sunshine, the warmth, the beach, the seafood. It was very nice.

Christmas was a quiet day. Several of us have colds, others have been stressed and working too many hours. So we just watched movies and played with Miss Munchkin and tried to keep the wrapping paper out of her mouth. The best gift seemed to be the Flexible Flyer horse we got her. It didn't take long for her to figure out how she could move to get the horse moving. It is going to be a while, though, before she'll be able to ride it herself.

And I bought her a stocking that had the head of a cat at the top of it. I was going to make her a stocking. I got all of 4 rows done on it. I'll have to finish it next year. But the cat stocking was a big hit. Miss Munchkin loves "fluffies" and all day long she'd carry that stocking around and put her face right down into the cat's face and make her "kitty cat" noise, which is sort of a cross between a meow and a purr and a dinosaur growl. Very cute. That's what she's doing in these pictures, in addition to trying to eat the nose of the cat!

Free Time?

So what happened to all this free time I was going to have after David went to college? Obviously, I was delusional. There is no such thing as "free time." The universe expands to absorb all free time. Anyone with free time is living in another dimension. They are certainly not living in the same dimension that I am living in!

Last year my mornings were spent on the road and sitting at college, waiting while David took his college classes. I was able to read and crochet while David was in class and converse with David while on the road. Now my mornings seem to disappear into laundry, dishes, e-mail and phone calls, with occasional hours here and there working on my website and listing books on e-bay. And I don't feel like I am accomplishing any more than I was last year. At least last year I was able to tangibly see and feel results. Afghans crocheted. Book titles added to my "books read" list. How do you tangibly see and feel the dishes done or e-mail sent?

My mornings are also being absorbed by another hour of sleep and sometimes by some morning exercises. So I am feeling more rested, I am less cranky, and might possibly be slightly more fit (but only very slightly!). And I have exchanged my "getting David to college" project with "finding hubby a new job" project. So I guess I should not reasonably expect to have more free time. But it sure was a nice dream! Maybe free time will appear when all the children have left home? But then, the eldest child and the grandchild seem to be absorbing a fair bit of my time also, so maybe I should just resign myself to the fact that I will NEVER HAVE FREE TIME!

Oh, for time to crochet!

It must be summer. I've had barely any time to crochet lately. I almost miss having to drive David to his dual enrollment college classes at Calhoun each morning. At least then I had an hour, some days almost two hours, solely devoted to either reading or crocheting. Or maybe I should begin to go sit at karate again in the evenings, waiting for Charles to get finished with classes, instead of just dropping him off and letting Bill pick him on his way home. I got a lot of crocheting done there. But here at home it seems like there's always something else I have to be or should be doing. Dishes, laundry, e-mail, playing with Miss Munchkin, playing Mah-Jong, paying bills, working on webpages, etc., etc., etc. No time for crocheting. And this month the Nextel Cup races are on cable stations, so I can't even plan on a Sunday afternoon of race watching and crocheting.

I'm currently working on an afghan for David for college, but at the rate I'm going with it, there is no way I'll have it done by the time he heads of to Evansville. He'll be lucky if he gets it by the time the snow flies up there. And then I've several projects I want to work on. Each day, Annie's Attic has a free pattern on their website:

http://www.anniesattic.com/free_pattern_day/index.html

So now, in addition to the dozens of books and pamphlets I have with crochet patterns, I've been saving many of the patterns from Annie's Attic. I'll never have enough time to crochet them all. It's like books … so many to crochet, so little time!

I do need to begin planning Christmas presents, if I'm going to crochet anything for Christmas. There's a lion I'd love to make for Miss Munchkin. And my niece Chelsea graduates from high school next year, so I need to think of what afghan to make for that present. Oh, and I know of a new baby that'll be making his/her way into the world around the first of the year, so I'll have to make a baby blanket. Lots of projects! Guess I better quit blogging and get to work crocheting!